Alan Wake 2 has been out for just a weekend, and Remedy has already put out a new patch. However, the patch notes aren’t terribly specific, with one amusing exception.
Controversial Streamer Nickmercs Will Stream Gambling On Kick
Controversial streamer Nick “Nickmercs” Kolcheff recently announced a massive $10 million deal with Twitch rival Kick, and it seems that, although he once implored pro-LGBTQIA people to “leave children alone,” he’s not worried about teaching children how to gamble.
15 best action movies on Max for a little adrenaline bump
Fantastic fights, stupendous stunts, calamitous chases, and climactic spectacle so bonkers it’ll blow your mind — it’s the 15 best action movies on Max (formerly known as HBO).
Want to shake off the doldrums of a long day with something bone-rattlingly exciting? You need an action movie stuffed with fantastic fights, stupendous stunts, calamitous chases, and climactic spectacle so bonkers it’ll blow your mind.
Whether your interests lean to science fiction, fantasy, cop drama, disaster flicks, superheroes, heist thrillers, mythic monsters, family-friendly adventure, or R-rated violence, we’ve got you covered with a top-notch collection of awesome movies.
Here are the 15 best action movies on Max.
1. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Credit: Moviestore / Shutterstock
J.R.R. Tolkien’s high-fantasy novel is brought to vivid life by Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings Trilogy, which began in 2001 with this widely acclaimed first chapter. In the mystical realm of Middle-earth, a humble Hobbit known as Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood) takes on an epic quest to destroy a mighty token sought by a powerful sorcerer. Hunted by dark forces, Frodo finds strength in the fellowship that surrounds him. Noble elves, brooding warriors, churlish dwarves, wise wizards, and hungry Hobbits join in the battle to save their world in a celebrated film series that had audiences and critics in awe. Best yet, you can make a DIY movie marathon by adding The Two Towers and The Return of the King to your watch list. — Kristy Puchko, Film Editor
How to watch: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring is streaming on Max.
2. The Matrix
Can you see the world inside the code?
Credit: Warner Bros / Village Roadshow Pictures / Kobal / Shutterstock
Credit: Warner Bros / Village Roadshow Pictures / Kobal / Shutterstock
It’s the 1999 action movie that changed the game. Keanu Reeves stars as Neo, a hacker who tumbles down a digital rabbit hole to discover the world he knows is a simulation. Joining forces with a band of rebels (that includes Laurence Fishburne and Carrie-Anne Moss), he seeks to topple the robot tyrants that have enslaved humanity. This quest leads to eye-popping fights, breath-snatching escapes, and mind-bending reveals. Writing and directing duo Lana and Lilly Wachowski blew critics and audiences away with their incredible vision. Their disturbing sci-fi dystopia is snugly wrapped in a captivating cyberpunk aesthetic that’s as cool as Reeves is in a long black trench coat. On top of all this, the Wachowskis presented a ground-breaking visual effect dubbed bullet time, which slowed action down but gave a bevy of angles to make every hit land harder. You can keep the thrills going by completing the trilogy: The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions are also available on Max. — K.P.
How to watch: The Matrix is streaming on Max.
3. Birds of Prey
Credit: Warner Bros / Moviestore / Shutterstock
Max has a whole hub dedicated to DC adaptations, meaning you can enjoy everything from Justice League and Constantine to a slew of Batman movies and animated offerings. Subscribers are spoiled for choice. But our pick for the movie most jam-packed with bonkers action is 2020’s Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn). The Suicide Squad sidekick finally gets her solo outing, and director Cathy Yan dreamed up an incredible three-ring circus of action scenes, ranging from bone-snapping bar brawls to glitter-bombed prison breaks, a maniacal musical number, a car chase on roller skates, and a team-up showdown that is explosively awesome. Margot Robbie stars alongside Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Rosie Perez, Jurnee Smollett-Bell, and Ella Jay Basco in an R-rated superhero movie that’s audaciously violent, unapologetically sexy, and as wildly fun as a Harley movie demands. (For bonus thrills, check out the TV-MA cartoon series Harley Quinn.) — K.P.
How to watch: Birds of Prey is streaming on Max.
4. Upgrade
Two years before Saw writer and actor Leigh Whannell made a name for himself as a director with his outstanding and celebrated freshening-up of The Invisible Man, he delivered a little cult actioner that not nearly enough people noticed at the time called Upgrade. A cybernetic spin on RoboCop, Upgrade stars Alien: Covenant‘s Logan Marshall-Green playing an auto mechanic named Grey who, after being paralyzed by a gang of thugs who also kill his wife right in front of him, accepts a hush-hush invite to test drive some future tech in the form of a computer chip implanted in his brain that will fix his motor functions.
Obsessed with catching and punishing his wife’s murderers, Grey makes an easy mark for a computer chip that inevitably begins revealing its sentience. Gifting him with the super-human ability to kick unholy amounts of ass in hand-to-hand combat, it turns out the tech has its own nefarious motives. Disgracefully ignored at the box office, Upgrade is sleek and hyper-violent and pretty much perfect. — Jason Adams, Entertainment Reporter
How to watch: Upgrade is now streaming on Max.
5. Spy
Credit: Larry D Horricks / 20th Century Fox / Kobal / Shutterstock
Schwarzenegger. Stallone. Van Damme. And, uhh, Melissa McCarthy? Believe it or not, the Bridesmaids actress and Go scene-stealer made the case for herself as a terrific action star, albeit of the comic variety, with Paul Feig’s stellar spy spoof from 2015. A goof on the James Bond movies, Spy is as twisty and thrilling as anything Daniel Craig blue-steeled his way through, just with way more cat sweatshirts — which is to say everybody wins.
As Susan Cooper, a CIA agent on permanent desk duty who gets pulled into the action precisely because she doesn’t look like anyone anybody would think of as a spy, McCarthy revels in her fish-out-of-water fights with an evil Russian arms dealer and his crew, especially his daughter Rayna (a wildly funny Rose Byrne). The jokes stick as hard as the stabbings, and there are enough double and triple and quadruple-crosses to keep everybody guessing in between the rat-a-tat punchlines. And extra bonus points for Feig and co. letting Jason Statham flex his funny bone alongside his biceps. — J.A.
How to watch: Spy is now streaming on Max.
6. From Dusk Till Dawn
Although it’s practically impossible now to not know that this is a vampire movie, when Robert Rodriguez’s From Dusk Till Dawn landed in 1996, nobody saw the second-act swerve into full-on horror territory ahead. Instead, this seemed like just another Pulp Fiction riff about wise-cracking criminals getting in over their heads, co-starring Tarantino himself no less. Tarantino, who co-wrote the screenplay with Rodriguez, brilliantly used that misdirection to the movie’s advantage, so it was truly a WTF moment when Salma Hayek’s character morphed mid-strip into a bloodsucker in stilettos.
Watching the movie now, it’s just a bloody good time, with a barnstormer of an ensemble cast that includes Harvey Keitel (playing the straight man!), Juliette Lewis, Cheech Marin, Danny Trejo, Fred Williamson, genre icon Tom Savini, John Hawkes, and of course George Clooney at his Caesar cut-sporting, sleaziest best. Ludicrous fun. — J.A.
How to watch: From Dusk Till Dawn is now streaming on Max.
7. Immortals
Credit: Universal / Kobal / Shutterstock
Shoved aside as yet another rip-off of Zack Snyder’s 2006 blockbuster 300, Tarsem Singh’s Immortals has nevertheless in the 12 years since its release become my preferred destination for visually spectacular and mythologically inclined hyper-stylized action of the homoerotic kind. Starring Henry Cavill as mortal warrior Theseus, Immortals is a remix of myths similar to what Baz Luhrmann would do to musicals with Moulin Rouge.
With stunning costumes from Oscar-winning costume designer Eiko Ishioka lighting up Singh’s typically outrageous visuals, we watch as the deities (including Luke Evans as Zeus) reluctantly team up with the mortals to battle the scheming King Hyperion (Mickey Rourke). It’s one spectacular spectacle sent down from Mount Olympus itself. — J.A.
How to watch: Immortals is now streaming on Max.
8. The Terminator
Who could have thought that a techno slasher starring a monosyllabic bodybuilder from the co-director of Piranha II: The Spawning would go on to become one of the most iconic sci-fi films ever? But that’s just what happened when director James Cameron hallucinated a terrifying robot skeleton during a literal fever dream, setting him off to plot out the relatively simple story of a cyborg (Arnold Schwarzenegger) that travels back in time in order to kill a woman named Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) before she can give birth to the leader of the robot resistance.
While the story has grown more convoluted with each progressive sequel and reboot, this first in the series has a clear, horror-movie simplicity that never loses its appeal. Also appealing? Sweaty Michael Biehn as Sarah’s future-sent protector, as well as the gritty, neon-lit Los Angeles it’s all set against. It really doesn’t matter how many times that dastardly robot tells us he’ll be back, the first time remains the sweetest. — J.A.
How to watch: The Terminator is now streaming on Max.
9. Batman Returns
The best Batman movie of them all! Period. Do not pass go, do not collect 200 Miss Kitties. Max has all the other Bat-candidates streaming — Tim Burton’s original, the Nolan trilogy, the Schumacher one-off, plus Matt Reeves’s fresh 2022 take with Robert Pattinson — so feel free to test that assertion, but I stand by it. Where else are you gonna get Michelle Pfeiffer purring in patent leather? A soiled Danny DeVito biting a man’s nose off? A cascade of sexual perversions masquerading as a routine superhero flick, Batman Returns bewildered the unsuspecting public when it came out in 1992. But it was formative for an entire generation of queer kids to be, and we’re still cat-whipping ourselves to completion with umpteenth Christmas-time rewatch. Never forget: Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it, but a kiss can be even deadlier if you mean it, baby. — J.A.
How to watch: Batman Returns is now streaming on Max.
10. Predator
Credit: Moviestore / Shutterstock
This list could be nothing but Arnold Schwarzenegger movies, and we’d all leave satisfied. As is, we’ll make do with two, including John McTiernan’s glorious 1987 hyper-violent jungle thriller Predator here. Introducing one of cinema’s coolest and creepiest villains, a lizardy space hunter who has a thing for tearing out spines and turning invisible, Predator takes a page out of Aliens‘ playbook by introducing us to a ragtag gang of hard-ass soldier-types, each one cooler and harder-assed than the one before him. And then it shows them each getting sliced through like Velveeta cheese by an enemy that’s way outta their league. All until the final girl — in this case, the big, burly, cigar-chomping Dutch (Schwarzenegger) — and the monster finally go toe-to-toe in an explosive finale wherein the word “explosive” can barely contain the amount of charges these filmmakers detonated in the jungle. This is deliciously muscular stuff. Literally! — J.A.
How to watch: Predator is now streaming on Max.
11. Edge of Tomorrow
Groundhog Day on steroids is a good way to describe director Doug Liman’s ass-kicking Edge of Tomorrow, which stars Tom Cruise as a soldier trapped in a time loop while fighting some bad mother aliens from outer space. It turns out that every time the aliens kill him, he wakes back up at the beginning of the day before the big battle, which forces him to use what he learns each time through to get him further and further behind the enemy’s defenses. So yes, it’s explicit video-game plotting, but with the added benefit of watching one of the world’s most obnoxious movie stars die repeatedly.
Meanwhile, Emily Blunt struts off with the whole shebang (but then, she has a tendency to do that) as a much-heralded soldier who, it turns out, has been through the same experience. Her character, Sergeant Major Rita Vrataski, becomes vital to helping William Cage (Cruise) get his bearings — and also for laughing at him. Basically, this is a good movie for Tom Cruise haters, while also simultaneously highlighting all of the things he’s good at: running, leaping, smirking until he gets punched. We all win. — J.A.
How to watch: Edge of Tomorrow is now streaming on Max.
12. Blade
Credit: Bruce Talamon / New Line / Kobal / Shutterstock
Although it’s tough to choose between Stephen Norrington’s 1998 original and Guillermo del Toro’s excellent 2002 sequel, I give the edge to the first film because it’s got two things that del Toro’s lacks – namely, Stephen Dorff chewing the scenery as the villain Deacon Frost (and what a ’90s villain name that is), and that iconic opening scene where it starts raining blood at the vampire rave. (And what a ’90s concept that is!) The good news is that you don’t have to choose; they’re both streaming on Max.
But both films are fortunate enough to have Wesley Snipes in the title role, kicking unholy amounts of vampire ass as the Marvel creation of a half-vampire who hunts his vampire kind, way before “Marvel creations” in the movies were really a thing. Of course, we’re supposed to be getting a new Blade in the MCU eventually, starring Mahershala Ali, and I wish them well. But as dated as they may be in some ways, these two Blades remain as sharp as ever in others. — J.A.
How to watch: Blade is now streaming on Max.
13. Speed Racer
Unfairly maligned upon release, the Wachowskis’ live-action take on the 1960s manga and anime from Tatsuo Yoshida has gained cult status in the 15 years since it flopped in theaters. This kaleidoscopic creation begs to be beheld on the big screen, spinning and whirling and careening as it does with every candy color under the sun. If you’ve got a good set-up at home, you can’t go wrong watching the pop-saturated adventures of Speed (Emile Hirsch), Trixie (Christina Ricci), Pops and Mom (John Goodman and Susan Sarandon), and the whole gang as they rush us through a hallucinogenic wonderland of fast cars, thrilling races, and one adorable pet chimp. As usual with the Wachowskis, this movie was deeply ahead of its time and deserves total rediscovery. At least until I can see it again on a big screen as intended! — J.A.
How to watch: Speed Racer is now streaming on Max.
14. The French Connection
With the recent death of director William Friedkin, it’s the perfect time to revisit the movie that won him the Best Director Oscar in 1972. (Two years later, he got nominated again for The Exorcist… and then inexplicably was never nominated again.) Not just one of the greatest cops-and-robbers films ever made but one of the greatest films ever made, The French Connection stars Gene Hackman and Roy Scheider as two NYPD detectives on the tail of some big-time heroin smugglers. Based on real-life detectives, the film has a gritty vérité quality that captures the essence of 1970s New York, especially in its second half, which is generally considered the greatest chase scene of all time. — J.A.
How to watch: The French Connection is now streaming on Max.
15. Superman
The ultimate comic book movie, bar none. Christopher Reeve will always be Superman to me, no matter how many square-jawed, hyper-muscular Brandon Rouths and Henry Cavills and David Corenswets they toss at the role. And the same goes for Margot Kidder as Lois Lane. So, credit where credit is due — a man named Lynn Stalmaster was the casting director on Richard Donner’s 1978 film, and the dude did his job and then some. Every actor in every role of this movie feels forever iconic.
And that feeling infects every corner. Long before comic book movies were a thing, Donner and his crew cobbled together the blueprint, and every single Marvel and DC movie since has been forced to borrow something from it. Although I tend to think of the first and second Superman films as one story, because a little kneeling-before-Zod is needed too. But Gene Hackman’s Lex Luthor makes for a splendid (albeit goofy) villain, and every second of screen time that Reeve & Kidder share is movie magic. May we all find somebody to spin the world backwards for us when the time comes. — J.A.
How to watch: Superman is now streaming on Max.
UPDATE: Oct. 27, 2023, 1:57 p.m. EDT Updated to include the latest Max offerings.
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Credit: Max
12 of the best romantic comedies streaming on Hulu in 2023
“Fire Island,” “Palm Springs,” “Brown Sugar,” and “Sleepless in Seattle” are among the best romantic comedies now streaming on Hulu.
There’s nothing like a feature-length chance to fall in love. And there’s no better time to see it than right now.
Whether you’re preparing a cozy evening for two, having a long-distance hang with friends, or embarking on a private, solo cry over love lost/love won/the state of the planet/etc., romantic comedies are one of our greatest resources for emotional catharsis. Roll into the romance and humor of it all with abandon (and our help). Mashable has combed through every rom-com on Hulu to assess the best of the best for your streaming buck.
Here are the 10 best romantic comedies now on Hulu.
1. Palm Springs
Credit: Hulu
In one of the best movies of 2020, Andy Samberg and Cristin Milioti play nihilistic wedding guests who become stuck in a time loop à la Groundhog Day. Stupidly funny and surprisingly sweet, this sci-fi nightmare-meets-rom-com explores a been-there-done-that premise with a fresh approach and two leads you’ll fall for instantly. (Fair warning: If you’re in the middle of an existential crisis, maybe hold off on this one. Palm Springs isn’t your average meet-cute.) — Alison Foreman, Entertainment Reporter
How to watch: Palm Springs is streaming on Hulu.
2. Brown Sugar
Credit: K C Bailey / Fox Searchlight / Kobal / Shutterstock
Forget enemies to lovers, can you handle traveling the rocky road from friends to lovers? Rick Famuyiwa’s 2002 rom-com follows a pair of childhood friends on their journey to grown-up lust and commitment. Their story begins on a street corner, where listening to hip hop spurred big career dreams for a boy and girl. Years later, Dre (Taye Diggs) is a successful record exec, while Syd (Sanaa Lathan) is a powerful magazine editor. But despite their natural chemistry, other could-be loves keep getting in the way. Can they get “the best of both worlds…the buddy and the booty?” Interweaving a passion for music with desire for each other, Brown Sugar lays down a sweet and smooth story you can’t help but fall for. Nicole Ari Parker, Boris Kodjoe, and Queen Latifah co-star. — Kristy Puchko, Film Editor
How to watch: Brown Sugar is streaming on Hulu through Starz.
3. Fire Island
Credit: Hulu
Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice gets a modern makeover with Fire Island. Joel Kim Booster reimagines the rom-com of manners as a gay love story set in the eponymous vacation spot. There, a chosen family of gay men and their lesbian den mother (Margaret Cho) revel with sunshine, champagne, and karaoke. But an unexpected buzzkill arrives in the form of a pretentious and posh lawyer (Conrad Ricamora), who seems to sneer at the group’s idea of a good time. Despite an awkward introduction, the lawyer and the group’s main character (Booster) kick off a promising romance. But can it be more than a summer fling? — K.P.
How to watch: Fire Island is streaming on Hulu.
4. Sleepless in Seattle
It might get frequently confused with You’ve Got Mail, but Sleepless in Seattle is in solid company in the niche but excellent Tom-Hanks-and-Meg-Ryan-fall-in-love-without-meeting genre. Hanks plays widower Sam, whose son (Ross Malinger) convinces him to talk about his late wife on the radio. This story captivates listeners around the country, including Annie (Ryan), who writes to Sam and asks him to meet her at the Empire State Building on Valentine’s Day. As the day ticks closer, life mostly goes on, but chance encounters and missed connections pile up until the fateful meeting.
We know what you’re thinking: Do they go to the Empire State Building? Do they live happily ever after?? Who knows!!* — Proma Khosla, Senior Entertainment Reporter
How to watch: Sleepless in Seattle is now streaming on Hulu.
5. Crush
Credit: Hulu
The most refreshing thing about Hulu’s latest queer rom-com is that all the characters are super queer. This isn’t a coming-out story about the one queer girl at her high school or the shy lesbian who’s secretly crushing on the cool, unattainable straight girl — relatable, yes, but we’ve done it. Crush follows a playful (if predictable) love triangle in which very-out Paige (Rowan Blanchard) desperately tries to lock down her longtime crush Gabriella (Isabella Ferreira), the popular girl (guess what, she’s queer!), while drumming up a sweet connection with Gabi’s twin sister (Auli’i Cravalho), an introverted bi skater-girl type. The flirting is a little elementary at times, but the short-and-sweet Crush excels at showing young queer people being themselves and getting a sappy love story to call their own.* — Oliver Whitney, Freelance Contributor
How to watch: Crush is streaming on Hulu.
6. 50 First Dates
50 First Dates is one of those rom-coms you never remember loving quite as much as you do. (See what I did there?) Adam Sandler stars as a laid-back womanizer who falls head over heels for a woman with short-term memory loss, played by Drew Barrymore. This classically funny premise offers a framework for some killer comedic acting by the movie’s entire cast, as well as a surprisingly sensitive reflection on what it means to love unconditionally. Plus, it’s got penguins! And a walrus! —A.F.
How to watch: 50 First Dates is streaming on Hulu.
7. I’m Your Man
Credit: Bleecker Street
Want an edge of sci-fi to your romance? Then you’ve got to watch this 2021 gem, which was German’s entry for the Best International Feature Oscar. Maren Eggert stars as a scientist tasked with testing out a robot companion to see how convincingly human it might be. Tom (Dan Stevens) is handsome, attentive, and loves to dance. He’s designed to say the right thing and anticipate every need. The idea is seductive, but this deeply rational (and a bit cynical) woman isn’t so eager to fall for a robo-boy toy whose beating heart is an aim-to-please algorithm. Can real love bloom between (wo)man and machine? And what would that even mean!? Find out with I’m Your Man. — K.P.
How to watch: I’m Your Man is streaming on Hulu.
8. Rye Lane
Credit: Searchlight Pictures
Among the most winsome movies of Sundance 2023 is this South London-set romantic comedy. Directed by Raine Allen Miller, Rye Lane stars David Jonsson (Industry) and Vivian Oparah (Class) as heartbroken twenty-somethings who fatefully cross paths and might just tumble into new love. A humbling beginning with a bathroom meet-not-so-cute swiftly spins into a happenstance first date full of fun, banter, surprises, and a wee bit of breaking and entering. (Hey, breakups get messy.)
Painted in saturated colors, paced like a dance party, and brought to life by a kinetic ensemble cast, Rye Lane is a pure pleasure to watch. But it’s Jonsson and Oparah, with their killer comedic timing and off-the-charts chemistry, that make this movie soar.* — K.P.
How to watch: Rye Lane is now streaming on Hulu.
9. Notting Hill
English screenwriter Richard Curtis is the luminary of rom-coms, having contributed to such delights as Love Actually, Bridget Jones’s Diary, About Time, and Four Weddings and a Funeral. Among his most beguiling romances is this tale of boy meets movie star. Hugh Grant headlines as a humble bookshop owner whose simple life is thrown into spin — and the spotlight — when he falls for an ultra-famous American actress (Julia Roberts). Their flirtations are an alluring collision of British charm and American candor. The supporting cast boasts a scene-stealing Rhys Ifans, and the finale will make you cheer and swoon. — K.P
How to watch: Notting Hill is streaming on Hulu.
10. Sliding Doors
If you can handle a dash of drama in your rom-com, you’ll love writer/director Peter Howitt’s 1998 head-spinner. Offering two tales of love for one subway ticket, Sliding Doors follows Londoner Helen Quilley (Gwyneth Paltrow) on a splintered story of what happens to her if she catches her train or misses it. In one scenario, she catches her philandering boyfriend (John Lynch) in bed with another woman (a deliciously devilish Jeanne Tripplehorn). In the other, she arrives too late to expose his infidelity, so their relationship rumbles along while her other persona pursues passion with a charming stranger (John Hannah). Peppered with whimsy, warmth, and some shocking turns, this one will have you gasping, but leave you grinning.* — K.P
How to watch: Sliding Doors is now streaming on Hulu.
11. Happiest Season
Kristen Stewart and Mackenzie Davis star in this sapphic rom-com co-written and directed by Clea DuVall. But rather than it being a charming tale of falling in love, this is a rocking Christmas-set comedy about the drama of meeting the parents. When metropolitan Abby (Stewart) accompanies her girlfriend Harper (Davis) home for the holidays, she not only meets kooky family members, and a smoking hot ex (Aubrey Plaza), but also discovers her lover is closeted. Can this couple have a happy holiday under these conditions? Hijinks, drag queens, and Dan Levy will ensue. —K.P.
How to watch: Happiest Season is now streaming on Hulu.
12. Easy A
Want a raunchy teen comedy that’s surprisingly smart? Then revisit 2010’s winsome rom-com Easy A. Emma Stone stars as Olive, a modern-day Hester Prynne, which in this context means a high school girl who’s trading fictional sexcapades for gift cards. The boys get high fives for their sexual prowess, while — double standards being what they are — Olive get slut-shamed as a pariah. But don’t worry, she’s got a plan.
Will Gluck directs a star-studded cast that includes You‘s Penn Badgley as a lovable crush, Amanda Bynes as a judgmental mean girl, Thomas Haden Church as a confounded mentor, and Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tucci as Olive’s parents, who are funny, outrageous, and the definition of couple goals. They’ve got a pocketful (pocketful, pocketful) of sunshine, and all you have to do to enjoy is hit play.* — K.P.
How to watch: Easy A is now streaming on Hulu.
UPDATE: Oct. 27, 2023, 11:28 a.m. EDT This post has been updated to reflect the current selection available on Hulu.
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Credit: Hulu
The 20 best action movies on Netflix in September 2023
The best, most exciting action movies on Netflix, from “The Old Guard” to “Jumanji,” “The Dark Knight,” “Kick-Ass,” and more!
Looking to fuel up your Netflix queue with some high-octane action?
Whether you’re a fan of wild Westerns, cunning detectives, high-swinging superheroes, ravenous zombies, or hard-core assassins, Netflix has a movie pitch-perfect for every kind of adrenaline seeker. But scrolling through the app can be a chore when all you want to do is Netflix and chill. We’ve taken out the hard step, highlighting the most stunt-stuffed, battle-powered, high-speed films the streamer has to offer.
Here, in no particular order, are the 20 best action movies on Netflix, streaming right now.
20. Dune
Credit: Warner Bros.
If you like your action movies with a heaping helping of cerebral sci-fi, then Dune is here to save the day.
Granted, director Denis Villeneuve’s adaptation of Frank Herbert’s classic novel takes its time more so than most action movies, focusing on the political intrigue between the various galactic forces who seek to control the desert planet Arrakis. But as protagonist Paul Atreides (Timothée Chalamet) begins to undergo a mythic transformation, we’re thrust into a stunningly crafted world of knife duels, hostile takeovers, and space battles. Oh, and sandworms — glorious, glorious sandworms. — Belen Edwards, Entertainment Reporter
How to watch: Dune is now streaming on Netflix.
19. Kill Boksoon
Credit: No Ju-han/Netflix
Gil Bok-Soon (Jeon Do-yeon) is a single mother who often finds herself at odds with her teenage daughter. She’s also a highly skilled and successful assassin. Kill Boksoon is a fantastic action film that sees its main character head straight from a brutal killing to the grocery store so she can get dinner on the table. It’s one hell of a hook that sucks you in immediately. The fight scenes are hypnotic and the cinematography ambitious and exciting. It’s a gripping thriller that makes plenty of space for the complex emotional reality of its characters.* —Kristina Grosspietsch, Freelance Contributor
How to watch: Kill Boksoon is now streaming on Netflix.
18. Spider-Man
Credit: Moviestore / Shutterstock
I can’t tell you how many times I watched my worn-out DVD of the first chapter in Sam Raimi’s ’00s Spider-Man trilogy, but suffice it to say, I can’t remember many other 2002 films. Spider-Man introduces a perfectly earnest Tobey Maguire as trembling genius teen Peter Parker. He’s pining away for his neighbor Mary Jane Watson (a superbly savvy Kirsten Dunst) and grieving while also developing superpowers from a fateful super spider bite. Meanwhile, he’s fanning out over his best friend’s dad, industrialist Norman Osborn (the exquisitely evil Willem Dafoe); little does Peter know his idol is also the villainous Green Goblin, who will soon be throwing Spidey around in many a nail-biting, cross-city battle.
We’ve moved through two other Spider-Men since Maguire’s run, but Raimi’s film wove unforgettable scenes into cinematic history — that upside-down rain kiss can’t be beat. In fact, the film has such iconic action shots in it that Spider-Man: No Way Home director Jon Watts included several in the now-infamous meet-up scene — watching Maguire dodge those Razor Bat pumpkins in 2002 and 2021 is sheer glee for fans. — Shannon Connellan, UK Editor
How to watch: Spider-Man is now streaming on Netflix.
17. The Woman King
Credit: Sony
It might be a cliche to say “This is the role they were born to play!” But when you witness the storming glory of Viola Davis as a hard-fighting general in The Woman King, that thought hits hard, fast, and repeatedly, like one’s heartbeat as this historical epic kicks into action mode.
In promoting the film, Davis has spoken openly about all the ways it’s the kind of movie that Hollywood’s supposed conventional wisdom — which caters predominantly to white and male audiences — said could never be made. Davis is a 57-year-old, dark-skinned Black woman, and she’s headlining a war movie in which she gets to be the titular protagonist and kicks slavers’ ass. As she expressed before the film’s World Premiere at the 2022 Toronto International Film Festival, she’s living her dream in this film. And for us, it was exhilarating to live vicariously through her.
Inspired by the Agojie of West Africa, The Woman King explores the passions, problems, and camaraderie of this all-female band of warriors. While Davis dazzles at its center, co-stars Thuso Mbedu, Sheila Atim, and Lashana Lynch shine alongside her. Each brings powerful charisma to a full-throated performance that keeps audiences equally riveted through scenes of battle or blossoming romance, gut-punching grief or pugnacious celebration. As she did with The Old Guard, Gina Prince-Bythewood marries action with emotion, creating sequences that make our pulses race and our hearts shudder.* —K.P.
How to watch: The Woman King is now streaming on Netflix.
16. Snowpiercer
Credit: Moviestore/Shutterstock
Before Bong Joon-ho won Best Picture with Parasite, he delivered an icy thrill ride crowded with action and political commentary. Based on Jacques Lob’s graphic novel Le Transperceneige, Snowpiercer is set in a post-apocalyptic future where the world has entered a merciless ice age, forcing all humans to survive on a single train that races around frozen terrain. But the cheap seats are much worse than flying in coach. While those in the back of the train live in squalor and suffer from starvation, those in the front revel in luxury and splendor. This pushes a posse led by one grim man (Chris Evans) to do whatever it takes to get to the front and fight for change. Also on board this star-stuffed action movie are Song Kang-ho, Tilda Swinton, Jamie Bell, Octavia Spencer, Ewen Bremner, Go Ah-sung, John Hurt, and Ed Harris. — K.P.
How to watch: Snowpiercer is now streaming on Netflix.
15. RRR
You’ve never seen an action movie quite as bombastic or as bromantic as RRR. Director S.S. Rajamouli draws loosely from history to tell the story of Indian freedom fighters Alluri Sitarama Raju (Ram Charan) and Komaram Bheem (N.T. Rama Rao Jr.). Over the film’s three-hour runtime, the two unwittingly face off in the search for a kidnapped girl, become the best of friends, and square off against villainous English colonizers.
Any of RRR‘s action sequences would be the pinnacle of a lesser action movie, but the film seems determined to outdo itself with showstopper after showstopper. Take when Raju faces down hundreds of protesters and wins, or when Bheem fights a tiger bare-handed. Would you believe me if I told you those happen within the first 20 minutes? The action — and the movie — only get more awesome from there. — B.E.
Where to watch: RRR is now streaming on Netflix.
14. The Harder They Fall
Credit: David Lee / Netflix
Put ’em up, as this is hands-down one of the best action movies in the Wild West.
Directed by Jeymes Samuel, The Harder They Fall defiantly redefines the predominantly white Western, boasting an incredible cast of Black stars: Jonathan Majors, Idris Elba, Regina King, Zazie Beetz, LaKeith Stanfield, and Delroy Lindo. A tale of heroes and villains, the film follows Nat Love (Majors) on his quest for revenge against the formidable Rufus Buck (Elba). But he’ll have to make his gunslinging way through “Treacherous” Trudy Smith (Regina King) and Cherokee Bill (Stanfield) first. Even before the opening credits roll, you’ll fall hard for this one. — S.C.
How to watch: The Harder They Fall is now streaming on Netflix.
13. Jaws
Credit: HA/THA/Shutterstock
In 1975, Steven Spielberg gave rise to the blockbuster with this iconic creature feature. Roy Scheider, Robert Shaw, and Richard Dreyfuss star as an unlikely trio of local sheriff, sea captain, and shark expert. Together, they brave the waters off Amity Island to do battle with a man-eating great white shark. Though not as action-packed as today’s blockbusters, this nerve-rattling adaptation of Peter Benchley’s beach read was scary enough to drive audiences wild and turn the tide of shark sentiment against the sea beast for decades. Yet nothing in the fear-mongering Shark Week can compete with action of man versus sea beast that goes down here. And every time you’ll be tempted to cheer when Brody snarls, “Smile, you sonovabitch!” —K.P.
How to watch: Jaws is now streaming on Netflix.
12. Enola Holmes
Credit: Netflix
Sherlock Holmes’s much cooler little sister is an overlooked young action hero in Enola Holmes. Based on author Nancy Springer’s popular book series The Enola Holmes Mysteries, the film puts the great detective’s savvy 16-year-old sibling on the case, played with energetic spoonfuls of gumption by Stranger Things star Millie Bobby Brown. She’s set to solve the greatest mystery of her young life: to find her missing mother (Helena Bonham Carter) through a series of deliberately cryptic clues — all while breaking the fourth wall and confiding in the audience, thanks to Fleabag director Harry Bradbeer and His Dark Materials‘ Jack Thorne’s sharp screenplay.
Stepping into the footsteps of her famous brother Sherlock (Henry Cavill) and avoiding those of her stuffier misogynist brother Mycroft (Sam Claflin), Enola’s case leads her on a wild ride through Victorian-era England, with more than a few fistfights and butts to kick along the way. And lucky for you, the sequel is even better. — S.C.
How to watch: Enola Holmes is now streaming on Netflix.
11. 65
Credit: Patti Perret/Sony Pictures Entertainment
Sometimes, you get the urge to watch an Oscar-nominated actor blast a bunch of dinosaurs with a laser gun. And when that urge sneaks up on you, the only cure is 65.
65 is built around the genius premise that is “Adam Driver fights dinosaurs,” and boy, does it deliver. As Mills, a pilot from a super advanced civilization from 65 million years ago, Driver crash-lands on prehistoric Earth, where he headshots a T. Rex, bludgeons a raptor, and much, much more. He also takes the time to bond with his one fellow survivor, a young girl named Koa (Barbie‘s Ariana Greenblatt). The result is a sweet “lone wolf and cub” movie full of dino-sized thrills, kills, and a very threatening asteroid. — B.E.
How to watch: 65 is now streaming on Netflix.
10. They Cloned Tyrone
Credit: Netflix
With this 2023 release, co-writer/director Juel Taylor pulls plenty of inspiration from Blaxploitation. John Boyega, Jamie Foxx, and Teyonah Parris star as a drug dealer, a pimp, and a sex worker who undercover a nefarious conspiracy that’s happening underneath their neighborhood. Taylor and fellow screenwriter Tony Rettenmaier weave in wild twists, fly fight scenes, irreverent humor, and swaggering style for what our critic called “a propulsive comedy-thriller with weight.” As bold as it is star-studded, you won’t want to miss They Cloned Tyrone. And stay for the credits, trust us. —K.P.
How to watch: They Cloned Tyrone is now streaming on Netflix.
9. The Nice Guys
If you’re a sucker for black comedy, witty dialogue, ’70s style action, and/or odd-couple comedic duos, it doesn’t get much nicer than The Nice Guys.
Jackson Healy (Russell Crowe) and Holland March (Ryan Gosling) play a pair of washed-up private investigators who reluctantly join forces to search for a missing woman (Margaret Qualley) in 1977 Los Angeles — with occasional assistance from March’s clever teenage daughter, played by Angourie Rice. Though the mystery takes the gang to the farthest reaches of the city, burrowing deep into rabbit holes and brushing up against all manner of eccentrics, it’s the unexpected chemistry between Crowe and Gosling that really keeps this engine running, and it’ll leave you wishing for more where that came from.* — Angie Han, Deputy Entertainment Editor
How to watch: The Nice Guys is now streaming on Netflix.
8. Triple Frontier
Credit: Netflix
This Netflix adventure has Ben Affleck, Oscar Isaac, Charlie Hunnam, Garrett Hedlund, and Pedro Pascal coming together as a group of former Special Forces who plan an elaborate heist in South America. But after things get out of hand, their survival skills are put to the ultimate test.
Putting a talented cast in a tension-filled scenario, Triple Frontier is the type of gritty thriller that’s hard to turn away from. — Brooke Bajgrowicz, Entertainment Fellow
How to watch: Triple Frontier is now streaming on Netflix.
7. Okja
Credit: Netflix
Blending drama with fantasy/adventure and weaving in a very real message about the horrors of the meat industry, Bong Joon-ho‘s Okja is a beautifully unique creature feature, striped with action.
The film follows Mina (Ahn Seo-hyun), the granddaughter of a farmer in South Korea who has spent the last 10 years rearing a genetically modified super-pig called Okja as part of a breeding project spearheaded by a grim U.S. corporation. This movie is dark in places, magical in others, and poignant overall, asking us to stop and reflect on the dark side of an industry the majority of us are complicit in. Tilda Swinton and Jake Gyllenhaal make for an entertaining pair of villains, too.* — S.H.
How to watch: Okja is now streaming on Netflix.
6. Rush
There are plenty of good reasons to watch Rush, including the charismatic performances by Chris Hemsworth and Daniel Brühl as rival Formula One drivers, the dramatic story beats pulled from actual history, and the fabulous sets and costumes steeped in ’70s style (especially everything Olivia Wilde‘s character wears). But the best reason of all is the racing scenes, which director Ron Howard imbues with such a propulsive thrill that you may find yourself making race car noises (vroom, vroom) for hours afterward, like a little kid tearing into a new box of Hot Wheels on Christmas morning. Uh, not that I’d know from personal experience or anything. — A.H.
How to watch: Rush is now streaming on Netflix.
5. Da 5 Bloods
Credit: Netflix
Spike Lee copters audiences back to the Vietnam War with Da 5 Bloods, a daring film that’s part drama, part war movie, and part heist flick. Named for a squad of Black U.S. Army soldiers of the 1st Infantry Division, Lee’s critically heralded 2020 joint follows this band of brothers through a treacherous war zone, then rediscovers them in a present where they’re seeking to uncover the past — and a big payday.
Sequences of brutal battles, narrow escapes, and high-tension hijinks make Da 5 Bloods an enthralling watch. Though inspired by history, it’s impossible to predict where Lee’s story will lead. Our guides on this intense journey through time, loss, war, and brotherhood are Delroy Lindo, Jonathan Majors, Clarke Peters, Norm Lewis, Isiah Whitlock Jr., and the late Chadwick Boseman. Together, they and Lee create an American war film that can’t be missed. — K.P.
How to watch: Da 5 Bloods is now streaming on Netflix.
4. The Raid: Redemption (and The Raid 2)
Looking for high-octane martial arts action? Then you’re in luck, because Gareth Evans’s thriller The Raid: Redemption (and its sequel, The Raid 2) are both streaming on Netflix.
This Indonesian action masterpiece takes a relatively simple premise — a police squad raids a crime lord’s apartment block — and elevates it with shocking plot twists and some of the best fight scenes put to film. Choreographed by Iko Uwais and Yayan Ruhian, who also star, The Raid‘s action sequences are no-holds-barred smackdowns that will have you on the edge of your seat. They feature everything from the Indonesian martial art pencak silat to machetes and guns, making for fights that are as varied as they are brutal. — B.E.
Where to watch: The Raid: Redemption is now streaming on Netflix.
3. Army of the Dead
Credit: Netflix
Sometimes all you want is to grab hold of that action-o-meter and crank the dial, hard, to a solid 11. Army of the Dead more than delivers on that front, opening with a musical montage of guns and exploding body parts — and it only gets gorier from there. Zack Snyder‘s story follows a band of mercenaries hired to steal $200 million from a casino in Las Vegas. The problem? Vegas has been invaded by zombies, the city is quarantined, and the military is planning to blow the entire thing up with a tactical nuclear strike. The sprawling cast includes Dave Bautista, Omari Hardwick, Hiroyuki Sanada, Garret Dillahunt, and Ana de la Reguera, as well as a digitally added Tig Notaro.
What follows is a gloriously silly romp that refuses to take itself too seriously, propelling us through a series of explosions and bullets while the story twists and turns through a 148-minute runtime that feels oh, so much shorter. — S.H.
How to watch: Army of the Dead is now streaming on Netflix.
2. The Dark Knight
Credit: Moviestore/Shutterstock
The entirety of Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy is streaming on Netflix, but if you only have time to watch one movie, make it the highlight. Make it The Dark Knight.
While artfully directed high-speed car chases and hand-to-hand combat abound here, it’s the introduction of Heath Ledger’s Joker that sets this film apart. He’s chaos in clown makeup, pushing Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) to his limit with a series of attacks and moral dilemmas that terrorize Gotham. A gripping crime drama full of unforgettable sequences, The Dark Knight isn’t just the best comic book movie of all time — it’s one of the best action movies of all time, too. — B.E.
How to watch: The Dark Knight is now streaming on Netflix.
1. The Old Guard
Credit: Netflix
Folks looking for that summer blockbuster thrill, search no further than The Old Guard. Based on the superhero comic books of the same name, director Gina Prince-Bythewood‘s movie sucks viewers into a slick, well-crafted world of action and narrative that isn’t particularly unique but delivers its formulaic pieces with enough precision to keep you invested.
Charlize Theron crushes as the ass-kicking leader of an immortal warrior fight crew, with performances by Harry Melling, Marwan Kenzari, KiKi Layne, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Veronica Ngo, Matthias Schoenaerts, and more.* — Alison Foreman, Entertainment Reporter
How to watch: The Old Guard is now streaming on Netflix.
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Credit: Netflix
* denotes the entry comes from a previous Mashable list.
UPDATE: Sep. 8, 2023, 5:00 p.m. EDT This post has been updated to reflect the current selection on Netflix.
Mortal Kombat 1 Adds Scary Microtransactions With New Fatality
Mortal Kombat 1, NetherRealm’s newest entry in its three-decades-old fighting game series, continues its predecessors’ tradition of pulling gut-yanking, brain-pounding final moves, or Fatalities, to the delight of its gore connoisseur fans. But some of those fans are frustrated. MK1’s recent patch introduces seasonal…
How to watch the MLB World Series: 2023 postseason schedule
What channel is the World Series on? Here’s how to watch every MLB postseason game live with or without cable.
UPDATE: Oct. 27, 2023, 4:00 p.m. EDT This article has been updated to include the latest information and streaming deals for the 2023 World Series.
Here’s how to watch the 2023 MLB playoffs:
BEST OVERALL
YouTube TV
free trial, then $52.99/month for 3 months
(save $60)
(save $60)
MOST AFFORDABLE
Sling TV Blue
$20/month for your first month, then $40/month
(save $20)
(save $20)
RUNNER-UP
FuboTV
free 7-day trial, then $74.99/month
Much to the surprise of baseball fans, spectacular turnarounds and surprising game seven wins have set up the Arizona Diamondbacks and Texas Rangers for the 2023 Fall Classic.
This will be the Rangers’ first appearance in a World Series since 2011, although it’s not the first to be played at their new park. In 2020, Globe Life Field was used as a neutral site during the pandemic-shortened season. Meanwhile, it’s the Diamondbacks first appearance in the Series since 2001.
What a long, strange trip it’s been for all teams this season. If you’re planning out your viewing schedule for the World Series, we’ve got you covered — even if you canceled your cable subscription a long time ago. Here’s everything you need to know so you don’t miss a pitch.
How can I watch the baseball playoffs?
Cable subscribers can watch the 2023 MLB postseason in its entirety on ESPN, Fox, FS1, and TBS. For those without cable access, you’ll either need to borrow a friend or family member’s cable login or subscribe to a live TV streaming service to tune into the action. If you can’t get your hands on a cable login to unlock access, don’t panic. We’ll show you how to watch the MLB playoffs without cable below.
For cord-cutters, here are the best streaming services to watch the MLB playoffs — as well as the best steaming deals.
Note: For the World Series, you’ll specifically need FOX networks.
Best streaming services to watch the 2023 MLB playoffs
Best live TV streaming service: YouTube TV
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Credit: YouTube TV
While many baseball fans had beef with YouTube TV during the regular season due to the lack of MLB Network on the streamer’s channel lineup, it makes up for it in the postseason. It offers a huge lineup of more than 100 live TV channels, including ESPN, TBS, Fox, and FS1 — all four networks you’ll need to watch the playoffs live.
YouTube TV also comes with unlimited DVR space, so you can record a game if you can’t tune in live. It’s one of our favorite sports streaming services and happens to be running a really good deal for a limited time. If you’re new to YouTube TV, you’ll get a free trial to test the waters for up to 14 days (trial period may vary). Then, you can choose to keep your subscription for an introductory rate of just $52.99/month for three months ($72.99/month thereafter) or cancel at anytime.
Most affordable live TV streaming service: Sling TV (Orange + Blue package)
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Credit: Sling
Sling is a popular cable TV alternative for a reason — it’s actually affordable, especially compared to other options on this list. What we love about Sling is the ability to tweak channel options to create your own lineup. In order to watch the Fall Classic, you’ll need the Blue package that Sling TV offers, which regularly retails for $40/month. However, Sling is currently offering 50% off for your first month, so you can sign up for only $20/month to kick things off.
Don’t want to keep Sling after the champions are crowned? Cancel with no strings attached.
Runner-up live TV streaming service: FuboTV
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Credit: FuboTV
FuboTV is one of the best cable TV alternatives for sports lovers, with the most robust lineup of channels for everything from college football to European soccer. It’s also a bit pricier than other services at $74.99/month, but you do get a seven-day free trial to test things out before pulling the trigger long-term. It may not be our favorite option for watching the 2023 MLB playoffs and World Series, but FuboTV does have a lot to offer the rest of the year.
Honorable mentions:
-
Hulu + Live TV — $76.99/month (includes ESPN, TBS, Fox, and FS1)
-
DirecTV Stream — $64.99/month (includes ESPN, TBS, Fox, and FS1)
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More often than she plays the part of lewd Twitch and Kick streamer Amouranth, 29-year-old Kaitlyn Siragusa is a businesswoman. But she’s primarily in the business of her body, hawking “made-to-order” water from her hot tub (sold out), a few strands of hair and her fart in a jar for a $400 sale price (sold out), and On…
‘Five Nights at Freddy’s’ review: Who is this for?
Josh Hutcherson and Matthew Lillard star in the PG-13 video game adaptation from Blumhouse, “Five Nights at Freddy’s.” Review.
Yes, yes, video game movies are made for fans of the games. And as Scott Cawthon’s Five Nights at Freddy’s, a point-and-click survival game from 2014, went on to spawn not only a slew of sequels, spinoffs, novelizations, and much, much merch, you might understandably assume its movie adaptation would be aimed to please its many, many fans. But which ones?
Those who seek something playfully scary? Those who want to get up close to live-action versions of the creepy yet cuddly animatronic monsters at its center? Those who want something silly and fun with loads of spookiness?
Well, if you want any of that, you’re sure to be disappointed. Five Nights At Freddy’s gets so bogged down in a soggy plotline about dream theory, guilt, and child custody that it forgets to be entertaining.
Five Nights at Freddy’s is burdened with too much backstory.
Credit: Universal Pictures
Like the first game, Five Nights at Freddy’s follows Mike Schmidt (played here by Hunger Games star Josh Hutcherson), a security guard tasked with watching after a Chuck E. Cheese-like pizzeria/arcade that has long been closed. Inside, there’s faulty electricity, dusty pinball machines, and towering, rotting animatronic critters that are meant to play ’80s rock songs on their prop instruments. However, these robo-rockers are possessed —Freddy Fazbear, Bonnie, Chica, Foxy, and Carl the Cupcake are driven to murder intruders.
The simple setup works well in the games without much additional exposition. But in penning the screenplay, Cawthon and collaborators Chris Lee Hill, Tyler MacIntyre, Seth Cuddeback, and Emma Tammi (who also directs) determined it necessary to explain why Mike would go back, night after night, to a place where adorably evil robots are actively trying to kill him. Fair enough. Financial straits might have been reason enough, because in this economy… But this script piles on the details, like a nervous liar. Not only does Mike need a steady income to maintain custody of his troubled kid sister Abby (Piper Rubio), but there’s also a tragic backstory about how Mike witnessed his little brother being kidnapped on a family camping trip years before.
Money alone isn’t keeping Mike coming back to the creepy arcade. He’s also on a quest to interrogate his personal dreamscape to find clues to catch this mysterious abductor. And hey, he just sleeps better on this job, okay?
What all this means for Five Nights at Freddy‘s is tedious scenes about the custody battle against Mike’s sinister aunt (Mary Stuart Masterson), his plaintive interview with a career counselor (Scream’s Matthew Lillard), and sessions with a child therapist. Plus, there are plenty of scenes of his falling-asleep routine and flashbacks to that terrible day, plus Mike explaining all of this to multiple characters. And all that means that this movie pushes freaky Freddy Fazbear and his creepy cohorts to the fringes of its plot. Sure, they play a part. But the actual anarchy wrought by animatronics makes up a frustratingly small portion of this movie. Lost amid Mike working out his various issues, the iconic characters become little more than uninspired guest appearances.
Five Nights at Freddy’s just isn’t scary.
Credit: Universal Pictures
Blame it on the focus on Mike’s maudlin family dramas. While the movie starts off solid enough, with a shadowy cold open of an unnamed security guard fleeing in terror from some strangely silhouetted stalker (with fox ears!), most of the movie is devoid of tension. For one thing, we know Mike needs to make it to night five because the title tells us so; the nights leading up feel like padding for a fuzz-flying finale. For another, the mythos behind these malevolent yet playful beasts is unrolled so slowly that it’s a bore. By the time actual stakes come into play, you may well have mentally exited this arena.
The actual scare tactics are woefully stock: Spooky shadows, jump scares involving flickering lights and chattering robot teeth, some creepy kids, and conservative sprays of blood. This is, after all, a PG-13 movie. But there’s nothing here worth screaming about or eerie enough to linger into nightmares.
That’s shocking, chiefly because Tammi helmed the seriously scary supernatural indie The Wind, which centered on a 19th-century frontierswoman plagued by bizarre howls in the night that might just be a demon. There, Tammi used haunting sound design and the terror of what’s unseen to harrow her audience. Here, she’s given a batch of much-beloved freaky figures that, by their very popularity, demand the spotlight — even if they’re scarier in the shadows. Rejecting the rule of Jaws, that less is more, we’ll see plenty of these monsters, with them becoming less and less mysterious and scary with every frame.
To the credit of the performers and puppeteers, Freddy and his posse are believably lifelike, with steps robotic yet firm. But they are just not scary for grown-ups who once knew all too well the bizarre entertainment of Charles Entertainment Cheese and his rip-off cousins like ShowBiz Pizza’s Billy Bob. Those things didn’t murder people (that we were aware of), but look at those smiles and tell me you didn’t suspect they could.
Five Nights at Freddy’s fails to play to kids or grown-ups.
Credit: Universal Pictures
If you grew up on these games, you may well thrill at having some of the sensations revisited in the cinema. But if you’ve ever seen a haunted house movie or a slasher, you’ll be all too familiar with the beats of scares to be surprised. I’m sorry to say I never jumped, screamed, or even gasped. And maybe that’d be okay if this PG-13-rated horror film was mainly meant to appeal to kids; keeping things cliched and pretty light on onscreen violence and gore would make sense. But if this is intended for kids, then why all the beleaguering backstory about Mike’s trauma and his struggle to keep custody of his sister? If that stuff is boring to an adult, will an adolescent have more patience for it? I doubt it.
There are moments when Five Nights at Freddy‘s scratches at its cross-demographic charmer potential. Embracing its creepy-cute aesthetic, roaming shots of the arcade are promising. Zinging close-ups of the characters are intriguing. But the screenplay gives no depth to these characters and is so distracted by the Schmidt family saga that it’s impossible to kick back and cruise on the spooky vibes. Even the third act’s twists fall short of thrilling because they are painfully predictable — even if you don’t know the game lore.
Perhaps if the movie had fully committed to the the kid sister, Five Nights at Freddy‘s could have played more like the PG-13-rated creepy kid/terrifying toy romp M3GAN, which was also from Blumhouse and Universal Pictures. If Mike was less a sad sack and more of a rascally bastard, we could have powered through with some Howard The Duck energy. If the backstory took a backseat to an escape plot and creature-feature thrills, it might have felt more like Gremlins. But as it is, all of these movies are far superior gateways to the genre for horror-curious kids.
In the end, Five Nights at Freddy’s is just another forgettable video game movie that fails to bring the thrills of play into the theater.
Five Nights at Freddy’s is now in theaters and streaming on Peacock.
